Accepting the Transitions of Life

Is Menopause a Joke?

The moment notice came that this month’s issue of Home Cures That Work would focus on menopause I knew the angle I would take in my monthly column on the Spiritual Dimension of Wellness. However, I also knew I would be unable to restrain myself from my favorite little joke on the matter of menopause.

Where is menopause mentioned in the Bible? Answer: “…and Mary rode Joseph’s a** all the way to Egypt.” My wife said, “Don’t you dare drop that in your column.”

Hopefully, I have not alienated half my audience. If so, my apologies and I should have heeded my wife’s warning. All kidding aside, the Bible does speak to every area of life and we don’t have to twist texts like that to get them to apply.

Of course, PMS and menopause are not the same thing. Menopause is part of life. It is a transition every bit as much as birth, puberty and death are transitions.

Though we think of it as primarily a female transition, the male body has its own version sometimes called male menopause, man-opause or andropause. Changing hormonal levels are normal as the human body ages and men and women transition out of a childbearing phase or season of life.

Seasonal Changes

The season of menopause is not a disease and therefore there is no cure. Granted, there are hormone therapies that mask it, but menopause is part of our design. They only way to fully avoid it would be to die early. For sure that is no solution and we are left to seek out healthy and positive strategies to navigate this normal transition.

Dealing with change is something that differs slightly from person to person. Some people are seemingly un-phased by even major changes. Others find their world turned upside down by even the slighted change. Since humans are holistic beings, when change begins to manifest in one area (physically for example), other areas (emotionally and spiritually for example) adjust themselves to the new norm.

My wife and I are a couple years away from our last teenager leaving the house. Teenagers vividly illustrate what I am describing. Physical changes are often at the root of adolescent emotional outbursts. Teenagers, at some point and to varying degrees, begin to question previously accepted spiritual beliefs as they settle into more mature understandings of themselves and as they relate to God. The wise parent understands the dynamics of this natural process and has patience and perspective. God certainly understands this process and has patience for us as we journey through the valleys and mountaintops of life.

We never outgrow the need to grow into the next new season of life. Just when we think we have arrived, we realize there is more to this journey. Transition defined is the act of passing from one state or place to the next. One thing is for sure; life never lets you stay in the same place very long. You can fight it all you want, but the fight is futile.

Looking to Cure That Which is Not a Disease

Acceptance is the starting place for navigating life’s transition in a healthy and positive way, which is true even for menopause. Holding onto your youth is a fixation to be found in many cultures over the centuries. Especially in mythology and fables, eternal youth is the treasure of all treasures to find. Science is hard at work trying to turn back the clock, as well; millions — if not billions — of research dollars are spent looking for cures for that which is not a disease.

Recently, a friend forwarded an email of Hollywood actresses who have not aged well. It actually made me sad because it was a series of pictures where multiple plastic surgery procedures resulted in unnatural distortions and grotesque features on the faces of otherwise beautiful people. It would have been better to have left themselves well enough alone. Aging is beautiful and these pictures were an example of how fighting it gets ugly.

Transition into Acceptance

When it comes to sickness, I teach people to not agree with their bodies, reject sickness and curse disease. Sickness is something the Bible teaches us to cast out. However, when it comes to natural processes, acceptance brings us into agreement with our bodies, which does wonders to minimize the levels of internal tension and conflict. With sickness and suffering we need to vigorously cast it out. With natural processes like birth, puberty or menopause or even death, part of how we move into acceptance is to thank God for what he is doing in us.

Each new day packs new graces from God. Each new season packs new gifts from God. As much as I wish I were as limber as I was in my twenties, I thank God I am in my forties. And by his grace I will thank him for my fifties, my sixties and my seventies. Each of those seasons come with more physical fragility, but each of those seasons is full of riches in life the younger generation never slows down to notice.

Death in fact is the greatest transition for those who are spiritually ready for it having made peace with God by accepting his Son Jesus as our Savior and Lord. Those who die in Christ immediately enjoy paradise with God. Jesus told the thief on the cross, “Today, you will be with me in paradise.” If we have this perspective we would not want to hang out any longer in the previous seasons of life and we will welcome and accept God transitioning us, even if it is into menopause.

The horror or horrors is that our bodies would transition from one season to the next and we would not be ready to make these transitions spiritually. Whatever season you are in, making peace with God of primary importance.  Billy Graham has a helpful website detailing steps to making peace with God and I commend that website to you.

 

Steve Hickey, is the founding pastor of a life-giving church with over 700 members, a church planter, a trainer of leaders with John Maxwell’s organization, a police chaplain, and is very active in politics as a national voice for the unborn. He’s written several books, including his latest, Momentum: God’s Ever Increasing Kingdom www.MomentumHandbook.com. Steve and his wife would like to pray for your specific needs and have a prayer team at the church waiting to hear from you. For more information or to submit a prayer request visit: www.ChurchAtTheGate.com/prayer.php